If you find yourself feeling crabby, tired, wanting to sleep all the time, feeling overwhelmed, snappy, anti-social, a bit well stuck, lacking any creativity. If the idea of intimacy makes you want to grab a sharp object are tearful or angry for no reason. Are impatient, your eating habits are changing and not in a good way, or are feeling disconnected from life.
Well it’s fair to say you need a blooming break.
I TRY to notice before sharp objects are needed that I am in need of a break, but sometimes it just kind of creeps up on you doesn’t it.
Your are coping, coping, coping and then bam you are on your knees in the dirt. And people are running for cover!
Likelihood is you where not okay a long time before you hit the deck, and you just ignored those warning signs. Maybe because you have got so used to coping, and firefighting. Low level depression and or anxiety is your day to day reality. Feeling crap is your normal.
The very idea of adding in something else when you are trying to hold it together for everyone else, stopping all the strands of your life, families life, friends and other relationships, work drama’s from unravelling seems frankly LUDICROUS.
But here is the thing, if we stop and realise that taking proper care of ourself is not only something we deserve, it stops us from getting burnt out. And when we are burnt out we are zero use to anyone.
Self care is NOT a dirty word, it’s a kindness to ourselves and others. Self care sitting at the heart of your life is a gift and a super power!
It’s NOT all bubble baths, chocolate and shopping. Although of course it can be that too. It’s also boundaries, rest, early nights, exercise, healthy choices, therapy, honest communication, time alone, saying no, and sometimes saying yes.
If you are out of the habit of self care, and let’s be frank many of us are. Then using a method to check in with yourself daily can be super helpful.
That could look like journalling, some form of meditation, yoga, a stillness practise that gives you a feeling of peace and connectedness. Anything that gives you time to NOTICE what is going on for YOU.
Armed with this knowledge we can impact change in our lives.
Second if you have had to deal with a stressful situation do NOT wait to crash, put some good S*** in straight away as soon as you blooming well can. If you have had to go into a state of hyper-alert and cortisol is flooding your body you have got to discharge some of that.
We all have different ways.
Here are a few ideas:
Follow your breath for 10 breaths.
Take a long bath WITHOUT your phone.
Go for a walk barefoot on grass.
Get outside in nature WITHOUT your phone.
Have a warm beverage and really take time to enjoy it WITHOUT your phone.
Read something uplifting and nurturing-poetry works for me.
Call a friend who doesn’t judge or try to fix and be listened too.
Watch a comedy or a funny podcast.Do a yoga class.
Or go for a run if you feel like you need to expel excess adrenaline.
Lay down and relax, listening to a yoga nidra can be super soothing and healing.
Plan a day or afternoon or hour off.
To do something totally indulgent just for you.
Have a nap.
Do something creative, draw, garden, sew, write a poem.
You cannot run on empty.
As the expert and gold medalist of crashing and burning I can tell you these tips are gold. Hard learnt, hard won.
Don’t wait to crash, make time to stay well. It takes so much longer to pick yourself of the floor than it does to stop and breath have a moment and then carry on.
Remember you can’t make the challenges in your life and others lives go away but you can find the reserves within you, to be present for those we love, as they walk through difficult times in their lives.
IF IF IF you have made time to fill your cup.
I love you. You are amazing. Keep going. You have got this. Don’t forget to make time for you!!!